For the past 30 years, I've been bucking the status quo, choosing to rely on God rather than government for my provision, my health care, my children's education, whatever. And I have seen Him do some miraculous things! He turned my knee so I can walk straight. I believe He removed a 3 pound tumor from my belly in a dream one night many years ago. He's miraculously put food in a cupboard that wasn't there a few hours before. He's given me beautiful clothing and houses when there was no way in the natural. My kids didn't have a lot when they were growing up, but I honestly don't think we'd have the relationship we do now had I sent them to school. It was rough and there were days when I wondered why I was doing it, but I firmly believed it was God's will for my children. I've seen so much and yet ...
Recently, I've been seriously considering giving in. Our row crops failed, the markets have been down, our chickens haven't been laying well, old health issues as well as new ones have reared their ugly heads. Grampa Tom has been in a panic. I've been feeling so much pressure to just give up, get a real job, sign up for government healthcare and just be "normal". After all, this dream that I believe is from God looks incredibly foolish right now.
But, I've been here before and God has come through. I can't do what I believe God has called me to do and hold down a real job. Earlier today it occurred to me that if I don't have faith enough to keep going now, what will happen if they come to take me to prison or to torture me or kill me because of my faith in Christ? I had to admit it. I don't have that kind of faith. But it's not about me or what I can do anyway. It's about Him and what He can do through me. So I asked, "LORD, please help my unbelief!" And He has! God is able!
God Bless You All!
~Grama Sue
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